:: Monday, January 26, 2004 ::
Well, the day I have waited for for 18 years is about to arrive. Just a mere 38 minutes. Woo...
Do I feel older? Well, define older. Tomorrow could be my last day so I could be the oldest possible. But the fact that the good Lord gave me another day makes me younger. Right?
So I'm a little more philosophical. I'm 18, what can you expect? Hmm...
Older? Well, I'm a little more wiser. Papa sure has taught me quite a bit. I'm a little more wrinkly and fatter. Just kidding. I'm skinnier than I ever have been. I think even since I was born.
You know, I'm happy. I'm everything I ever wanted to be. First, I'm 18. I made it. I'm a senior. Yeah, that kinda goes along with being 18, but hey, I didn't get kicked out, or drop out, or die. So, woo, I'm almost through with 13 years of my education. I have my own little style. Well, I share it with others, but its a style I'm happy with. I'm freelance, I'm sorta with the flow, but wading by the shore close enough that I can jump out. I have a job. Something I never thought I would have. And I've been there longer than 3 months, like was expected. I have a girlfriend. Now, I don't mean that like I own her. Anne is a blessing that I don't quite appreciate like God wants me to. But when do we ever do what God wants us to? Well, we worship him. Yeah, we do that right...
Anyway, I have a pretty little lady by my side that loves me and I love her. That brings me much inward joy. I have inward joy! That's something I've wanted for a long time. I've my ups and my downs. My lefts and my rights. I have steered down some horrible turns and even flipped upside down a few times, but in spite of all that, God still loves me and gives me inward joy. I have inward joy. That brings me even more inward joy.
I can play the guitar. I've wanted to for so long. I have hobbies (that are my own!). I'm intelligent. I may be ranked 20th in my class, but I can quarantee you that I can rock the world of the 19 people above me. I have colleges calling me telling me that I qualify for free-ride scholarships! CALLING ME!!! I don't call them. Hmm...speaking of...
I have an essay to write (of unknown length) due Saturday for that. Doh! Eh, who cares.
I'm very happy with where I'm at. Hopefully, Lord willing, I'll be this happy a year from now as I do my annual self-evaluation. Hopefully, Lord willing, I'll be this happy also. Through the ups, downs, and the craziness. Hopefully, I'll have the pretty lady by my side the whole time.
I got an interesting gift in the mail yesterday. Around 120 years ago, a man named Robert Walcutt purchased a Holy Bible. Somewhere around 50 years later he gave that bible to his granddaughter. Another 50 or 60 years later, on her deathbed practically, she gave it to Larry Walcutt. Here we are, 49 years later, and I have that bible in my possession. Cool, huh? Somewhere around 50 years from now, my grandchild will be holding that same bible in their hands, hopefully cherishing it as much as I do.
This bible isn't just any bible. It is controversarily the first bible ever printed in America. If that's true, its worth around 10 million dollars. My grandfather has spent 49 years researching this and other family history to see if its true. Now, while he thinks that it isn't, I still believe that I am holding something more valuable than money. See, this bible is my grandpa's greatest possession. Not because it could be worth a lot of money, but because it is THE Walcutt family bible. Two centuries of history follow this one single book. Inside is millenia of history about God and his greatest works. One is the bible itself. So not only do I have my grandfather's prized possession, but it just happens to be the world's prized possession.
Do I feel older? Yeah, you could say that. Am I ready for what the good Lord has in store for me in the next year of my journey? No. Will God be with me anyway. Yes.
Gott ist gut.
Alle der Zeit.
:: Ben 11:43 PM [+] ::