Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The Ambulance Chronicles
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::I'm an EMT, and I work on an ambulance. I'm aspiring to be a paramedic someday, but I might go for the MD also.
::Anne is my silly goose and we have been married for four and a half years. Time flies when you fight wars.
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:: Monday, March 13, 2006 ::

It seems that whenever I start to like the Army, I wake up

D-Day + 5

I was having this awesome dream last night. I don't know if we were about to leave for Afghanistan or coming home, but Anne came to see me at Camp Shelby and I was so excited. I about wet myself I was so ecstatic! I could see her running toward me, I was all decked out in the Army gear and whatnot and I thought to myself, "Well, this isn't too bad." Then I woke up to some guys alarm clock beeping ever so annoyingly and another guy saying, "It's 4:15 troops. Time to get up."

That instant I remembered how crappy it is to be here.

It was warmer last night, though. People may not think that one or two degrees makes a big difference, but it did. I didn't shiver nearly as bad last night and I didn't wake up in convulsions. Of course, it may have been how tired I was that caused that. Last night, we were up til midnight trying to get some SRP done. It was so annoying I can't begin to describe. It was all to save us an hour or two the next morning; however, today (when the SRP was to begin) no time was really saved because the computers didn't work last night or today. Good job, US Gov.

Anyway, so today was our SRP. Yes, if you remember from a few posts back (a month or so), you should remember me talking about an SRP in Oklahoma. It's the same thing, just different people this time. Things started out rough when our wakeup call came at 4:15. Not too bad. I mean, it could have been worse. So I stumbled out of bed and meandered my way over to the watering hole and shaved. Then I wandered back to my tent and brushed my teeth (you have taught me well, Ann). At around 4:45 I walked to the DFAC (big tent) for breakfast at 5:00. At 5:30, the contractors showed up with chow. Thanks guys.

So after munching on a horribly nasty breakfast and grabbing a quick cup of coffee, I went back to the tent and formed up to wait for the busses. About another 20 minutes after that, the busses arrived and shuttled us to the medical processing station. Now, this is usually the part that I am most terrified of because I just know that I am going to hear sometime during the day, "Whoa, soldier. You're too fat." I, thankfully, didn't hear that.

Anyway, so while we are waiting outside for our records, word gets passed down that if you are wearing contacts (me) you are wrong and need to get your glasses. I know that Ann packed my glasses, but I have no idea where. So after some other guys realized the forthcoming of our demise, SFC Gibson told us to fall in to the med station and we'll take care of it later. Great.

So we sit through three 15 minutes briefings and then finally being the medical processing. Well, since I know that I am going to spend a lot of time in optometry, I head there first. The guys there seemed surprised that I had my contacts and had me take them out. If you know me, you know how blind I am without my eyewear. So more stumbling around the station there trying to take care of other stations while my eyes "adjust". Apparently, everyone got a big ole kick out of me trying to find my way around by squinting. Thanks, guys.

Finally I managed to clear the optometry section and got a few glasses ordered (sorry, Ann, they aren't very cute) and managed to somehow clear two other stations in the process of "adjustment". However, I didn't have a way to put my contacts back in so I was stuck stumbling around all morning trying to make words out of slurry lines on signs. I don't know how (the good Lord I guess) but I cleared all of my stations. Granted, it was humorous to a few more people when they saw me holding my paperwork two inches from my face, but what can you do?

I had to get another hearing test done because my old one expired. Poop on that. I almost fell asleep in the testing booth! I did fall asleep in the waiting area! That didn't make up for my six or so hours of missed sleep, but I guess it will do for now. I put my contacts in before I walked the 1/4 mile or so to the audiology department of the TMC so that wasn't too bad.

After all the med processing, we got the privalege of completeing the rest of the processing (the stuff that was supposed to be sped up yesterday by keeping us up til midnight). That was a nightmare. Imagine 5oo or so troops all crammed into a space no bigger than two basketball courts and scattered with desks. It was interesting. I should've taken a picture. Shoot.

Anyway, it took forever. I waited in the finance section line for an hour or so, the ID card section for 30 - 35 minutes, and the personnel section for three hours! It was complete insanity. But it is finally done now. The only processing I have left to do is get my TB shot inspected on Wednesday and get my smallpox vaccine. Yum.

Now I am back here at the FOB (forward operation base) (tent city) waiting on dinner to arrive. I expect it about 45 minutes late. That's how the gov works I guess.
I don't know what is on our training schedule for tomorrow. Yesterday we had 11 hours of briefings over all the most random stuff they could think of to throw at us. "Outstanding!" as Ann would say.

God is good. All the time.

:: Ben 3:49 PM [+] ::
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