Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The Ambulance Chronicles
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[::Get to know me::]
::I'm an EMT, and I work on an ambulance. I'm aspiring to be a paramedic someday, but I might go for the MD also.
::Anne is my silly goose and we have been married for four and a half years. Time flies when you fight wars.
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::I am a former driver's ed student and I'm probably that kid that your family talks about almost hitting them.
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[::..Feeling nostalgic?..::]
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:: Saturday, March 22, 2008 ::

Holy crap, Batman

Yesterday just wasn't my day. Today isn't the best ever. I don't know what to expect about tomorrow. That's when I break "the news."

Yesterday I got a "stern talking to" about my work performance. Apparently over the last two weeks my professionalism has decreased and I practically stopped being productive, or so says my boss.

First question: how is watching people shop supposed to be productive? What is my quota on thieves? Holy crap, batman.

Here's the breakdown of our conversation and my thoughts following:

1. I slouch more.
2. I move around too much.
3. I keep my hands in my pockets.
4. I lean against things.
5. I am too friendly with the other employees.
6. I do searches too thoroughly.
7. I don't worship the ground the owners walk on (basically what he said.)

There may have been more but I stopped paying attention after point seven. Here are my thoughts on the points, which I kept to myself:

1. I complain a lot, but never to get out of work or get sympathy; therefore, no one at work knows about my shoulder and thus no one that when I slump my shoulders, it's because I am about to cry from pain and slumping my shoulders stretches them out and relieves a bit of the pain. However, I haven't and won't share this information.
2. When I first started working here, the boss told me I stand too much and move around to see things better. If I stand in one spot I don't know what is going on in the rest of the store so I move around. Now the guy has changed his attitude and is telling me I move around too much and I am to stay at my designated post. He even had the nerve to say, "Didn't they teach you that in the Army?" I don't want to hear CRAP from anyone about the Army who hasn't served themselves.
3. It's cold and I can't wear gloves. I don't care how gay I look, I'm warm.
4. I'm 230 pounds of matter (forgive me if I misuse my science terms.) If I lean against something, you will know it from the cracking sound or sight if the object sliding across the floor. Rest assured, I hold my own up. I don't get much sleep at night because I'm too worried about my wife in Iraq staying alive, but once again, I keep that worry to myself. If I seem to be leaning on something, it's because my legs are tired and I occasionally shift my weight back and forth. Leaning on everything? I think not.
5. His biggest point is mine as well. "Store policy is 'security is not to have relations of any kind with other employees.'" That has to be a joke. How in the world am I supposed to work with a hundred other people and not make friends? In fact, my friends are the ones who tell me about suspected shoplifters more. This complaint irks my being and I am furious that it is even suggested. I don't care what the store policy is on this matter. If I shall be fired, I would hope it is because I'm too friendly. I take that as a compliment.
6. The owners are paranoid about employees stealing, but don't allow me to enforce store policy (which is why I don't care about said policy in point #5.) I grab employees coats and feel them up and down, using my hands to feel for any objects inside, just like we were taught in the Army (I'm sure my sweet love is agreeing. Make your hands into two Cs and clamp the subject's arm or leg, etc). It's basic search prodcedures for any law enforcement, but it is too much for my workplace. I am supposed to simply touch the coat and from that determine if there is anything hidden. Oh come on people.
7. No I don't. I don't care if the business has been around for 15 years. That doesn't mean the owners know how to run a business; it means the owners know how to kiss the right butt and build up a client base (which is the basics of business management I'm sure. But if the owners knew how to run a business, they would care about the employee's concerns more and take care of them.) I don't and won't praise the owners for being cheap (albeit successful) men. I'll respect them when they treat their employees better.

And, no, I won't watch your dog or hold your coat. You are all about policy; sacking groceries, delivering food, dog watching, and coat holding are not in my job description or duties. Butt face.

I just can't stand the double standards and double crossing. The almighty dollar rules that place. Simply put.

And if that is what the owners want then so be it. I don't want to be a part of it.

I plan on quitting tomorrow. Actually, I plan on going part-time until they find someone else.

I hope my complaints aren't petty. I feel justified in everything, but I could be completely wrong. If so, then it won't be the first.

And screw the MTA; I'm walking everywhere from now on. I had yet ANOTHER (surprise, right?) run in with them. You get what you pay for, though.

I'm done for the night. My head hurts, my shoulder is throbbing, and my wife is on the other side of the world. What more can a guy ask for?

God is good. All the time.

P.s. This post brought to you while riding the Brooklyn / Coney Island Q train of the MTA New York City Subway.

P.s.s. I'm quite sure, though my knowledge in this area is non-existant, that I saw a hooker on the subway. I could be wrong; it wouldn't be the first time.

:: Ben 11:38 PM [+] ::
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